Crossroads

For the last couple years I've been considering and slowly working towards a degree in psychology.
A couple weeks ago, however, I stopped to ask myself: Why?

The simple answer:
Well, psychology is easy for me. I've always been able to read people and understand why people do things. I'm good at getting people to talk and helping them feel relaxed and safe. I analyze people's decisions and actions without hardly any effort at all, and usually without meaning to do so.

I wasn't satisfied with that answer. Just because something is easy doesn't mean you should spend your entire life doing it. So I delved introspectively to find the real cause of my desire to choose this career path.

The deeper answer:
Often times helping other people with their troubles relieves some of my own. When I'm delving into someone's mind - I can see things so clearly. It's like looking down on a maze and guiding them out of it; for I have the bird's-eye view. I think that part of me hopes that somehow by doing this I will be able to find my own way out of the maze.

The understanding:
I realized what a defeatist attitude I had. It's not like something horrible happened to me and I need to work it out. If that were true, psychology would be a perfect field to explore. I had settled for learning to deal with pain - when instead I should be focusing on fixing it. That's like hating yourself for being overweight but never doing anything to change that fact.

The solution:
I doubt that medical science will solve the mysteries I yearn to learn in my lifetime. But, that doesn't mean I shouldn't try. There are several biomedical fields that could potentially offer up solutions. Genomics, cellular biology, biochemistry, molecular biology, etc.

I don't know if I have the intellectual potential to pull off a career in the biomedical community - but there's no reason I shouldn't try. So, starting in February, I'm going to start taking some biology and chemistry classes. If I grasp the concepts and pass the classes, I'll keep taking them. If I fail, I'll take them again. If I end up having to accept that my mind doesn't work that way - I can always fall back on psychology.

Like I've always said - time doesn't change things; people have to change things. And I very highly doubt that many biomedical scientists are making my challenges their research priority.

So I'm off to register for school.
Wish me luck.

-Dylan